I need help getting my 10 months old to sleep through the night?

Ok so here's everything. My son was born at 30 weeks, 3lbs 5oz and was in the NICU for 5 weeks with no complications. He is now 10 months old and still will not sleep through the night, it's my fault because I continued feeding him at night when he would wake, now my boyfriend thinks the only method left is to let him cry it out and I'm only willing to do this as an absolute last resort. I exclusively pumped (he never caught on to breast feeding due to being in the NICU for so long) and stopped about two months ago, so now he just takes formula for preemies (recommended till he's one by his doctor) He's had rice in his cereal since 4 months because he had bad reflux and would spray milk out his nose constantly until we included the rice. So rice before bed does nothing for him. I've also tried feeding solids right before bed, as well as a bath, trying to keep a routine, etc...all the generic suggestions have been tried with no avail. He falls asleep between 9pm and 10pm, and has about two naps a day ranging from 30 mins to an hour. When he wakes up at night, he's usually just sitting up crying, i try to lay him down and pat his back but he begins to kick and thrash. Then when i try to pick him up to soothe him, he'll scream so loud and start pushing me away and kicking. I feel so bad because I don't what to do to make him feel better which is why i'd always break down and feed him. I want to stop this bad habit, but I don't want to let him cry it out, and I feel so guilty because it's my own fault for letting it go on so long. Does anyone have any suggestion possibly that could help? Sorry for the long story, but any help would be appreciated!